Memories of a special day

The wedding cake The newly weds arrive on the Cliveden Reach

Sixteenth of July Two Thousand and Five

. Outside Cookham church with Granny Partridge and my bridesmaid Isobel. Wedding guests wait on the towpath for a lift over to the island. The parties continued for several days. The newly married couple take the plunge, supported by a few friends...

Early morning commute from Cliveden

Messing about in boats

"There's nothing half so much worth doing," says Ratty to Moley in The Wind in the Willows, "as simply messing about in boats." Amen to that, rat. Because it might be 100 years since Kenneth Grahame published his children's tale about shifting seasons by the Thames, but England's most famous river is still charming visitors, as it has seduced writers such as Grahame for centuries. In Jerome K Jerome's famous travelogue, Three Men in a Boat, three upper-class layabouts row a skiff upriver from Kingston to Oxford, and between depictions of watery mishaps and disputations on modern Victorian life, Jerome finds time for lush descriptions of this dreamiest English spot. Cliveden, Jerome says, is where to go for "deep peace". Cliveden is famously known as the location for the 'Profumo Affair' - scandalous relations between Christine Keeler and the politician John Profumo in the 60's. Now a sumptuous hotel you can stay in Nancy Astor's 'country retreat' for around £300 per night - what a bargain! Although the house and gardens are imposing and impressive and make an interesting visit (you don't have to sleep over, you can go for the day and just pay the National Trust car parking attendant £7.50 for a family ticket) I prefer the extensive woodlands, the boathouse and the three small islands that you can just about make out far below the statue at the end of the formal gardens.

'Our' island is the first island you find nestling at the foothills of the Chilterns between Boulter's and Cookham locks if you approach by boat, as we did on Golden Mean in the October of 2003. It was our first trip up river having moved onto the boat the previous Summer. As we left the lock cut behind and the river opened out into the wider stretch known as the Cliveden Reach, the Autumnal colours of the trees that grow up the high chalk cliffs on the Cliveden side were spectacularly reflected in the evening sunlight, which skims across the backs of the horses in the fields by White Place Farm and warms dog walkers and cyclists on the tow path. This is in fact the West bank of the river as the Thames collides with the edge of the Chilterns and it's Easterly passage is diverted South. The sunset is last to fade at the very top of the Cliveden bank, where the trees remain bathed in light long after the island's nautical revelers are in shadow, putting on an extra jumper or extinguishing the BBQ and turning in for the night.

Having spent some weeks on the reach, a wedding reception and two baptisms we have still to find a mooring that we like better. We have history here, like so many other boaters (not to mention Jerome K. Jerome and Kenneth Grahame). We have tramped the woodland in search of logs and roasted sausages on an open fire (that's artistic licence for disposable BBQ since open fires are not permitted by the National Trust). We have returned from a day at work to find our dinghy has broken free from that particular tree root and we are stranded on the wrong side of the river, only to recover the dinghy the next day from the downstream side of the lock. We have swum in the river, as have many of our friends and families following our wedding at Cookham church where we departed to a medley of nautical themes on the organ which culminated in 'Messing about on the river'. We have gone aground around the back of the island, aptly named 'Slow Grove' and had to winch ourselves off by tying a rope onto a tree using the dinghy. Our first dinghy died on Slow Grove after I put my foot through the floor. We have commuted from Cliveden and seen cygnets appear through the early morning mist as we row across, not wanting to leave the electric outboard in the dinghy. We have begun to wonder if the dapper hired hands who captain the slipper launches out of the Cliveden boathouse have incorporated Golden Mean into their daily spiel, as they glide silently up and down the reach with their over dressed punters supping champagne in the bow.

At our wedding reception we were blessed with blue skies and a glorious sun all day. At Port's baptism we had one heavy shower which drenched the latecomers as they were rowed across from the towpath. Third time lucky, Starboard's baptism was pretty much a wash out in terms of the weather, but fortunately we were all able to shelter inside Golden Mean - with the exception of Great Uncle Stuart who dined in the hire boat which was moored alongside. Our decision to go ahead with the island baptisms was based on our conviction that the island is our spiritual home and has a truly magical quality whatever the weather. (And it could be argued that a storm is more memorable than a sunny day!) Just bring your wellies.

I discovered recently that other boating families feel just as passionate about the Cliveden Reach. We are not the only family to have claimed the island as 'ours'. To know that others besides Ratty and Moley have picnicked on the grass, rowed the reach, watched the sun go down beyond the Wild Woods, just makes it all the more special. There's nothing better than messing about on the river.

The Captain

To read more on Cliveden:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/main.jhtml?xml=/travel/exclusions/Supplements/essentialengland/nosplit/thames.xml

Smiley girl

Starboard keeping snug with Daddy

No.1 with Port (Ship's Boy)

Do blind people look like Labradors?

It has been widely observed that dogs and their owners often have similarities. On a recent walk we noticed a whiskery orange coloured terrier trotting beside it’s equally whiskery and red haired owner. I asked the Captain if I looked like Magic - which was really fishing for compliments as Magic is a very handsome dog - but I was duly disappointed. Fitting in is definitely a desire that humans aim to achieve. Observe the group dynamics at a football match. It would be ill-advised to be supporting Celtic in the Rangers part of the stadium. This is an extreme example but this desire extends right down to what might be considered trivia. A young man being questioned in court was asked if he had been drinking that night. He replied that he had been eating fish - and so would have been drinking white wine! Such is the desire to be socially acceptable. As a disabled person being different could leave me out in the cold if Darwinian evolution was allowed to take place in the human world. Fortunately for me this is not the case. This is largely due to the highly vocal and organised disabled lobby groups. When an ill informed footballer publicly announced that disability was a punishment metered out on account of one's deceased relatives there was uproar, and rightly so. When I turn up at a restaurant with Magic I’m normally met with people bending over backwards to help. If I encounter resistance I’ve been provided with a card which details the proprietor to telephone the Guide Dogs Association, no doubt to be informed about the Disability Discrimination Act and how it relates to guide dogs. In the Chinese Paralympics, a basketball player joked that the Chinese were over helpful. He said that on arrival at the hotel he was swamped by helpers. There was one assistant for each spoke of his wheelchair, one to hold his dreadlocks, and another to tie his shoelaces. This sort of unsolicited “help” is seen in the West as patronising. On London Underground the staff are carefully trained to ask if someone needs assistance and not to appear rejected if that help is not required. What is being built up here is a social etiquette surrounding disability. These efforts are not seen as 'chippy' or defensive. The disabled are simply demanding to be treated in a respectful, considerate and non patronising way. Thanks to their progress I’ve never been asked about the negative side of my children having a blind father or whether it might be a better idea not to have children at all in case they inherit the same eye condition. There are certain attitudes and questions that are naturally offensive to people that live on boats. When someone who has never lived on a boat describes our life as ridiculous, unsustainable or in some way detrimental to our children, they should expect a response. We have decided that to jump down someone’s throat for asking an ill-informed question is inappropriate and not our style. However, a non personally directed blog can tackle these issues in a way we feel can educate the ill-informed, confront prejudices and support other live aboard families . No. 1

Education in the field

'David Attenborough' and his best friend do Science - examining slugs in the marina after a rainstorm. On Port's birthday we visited a local ploughing competition and the boys learned how to plough straight furrow - well, almost!